Archive for the ‘English short pieces 英文小品’ Category

他来自第三世界 (with Eng translation- He Comes from The Third World) (Malaysiakini, 20 Jan 2010)

Wednesday, January 20th, 2010

LINK: http://www.malaysiakini.com/letters/122377

他 帮助美国驻海地大使馆

维持馆员人身安全

他 每天早上

摸黑走路上班

就是为了准时守候着大使馆门口

美国大使的马赛地轿子一到

马上给他开门

说一声:Good morning sir

911恐怖袭击之后

大使要求加强保安

要他在烈阳下仔细检查访客

以确保美国人免于袭击

他尽忠职守 还帮大使与馆员

跑到首都太子港街头买香菸啤酒

以确保美国子民的人身安全

大地震当天 他正好周休

走在街上 突然天摇地动

他马上奔驰回家 发现家人相安无事

马上又想起美国老板 又跑到大使馆

听说联合国总部也垮了

他心里着急 担心老板已遭不幸

所幸老板亦逃过一劫

他感激上帝恩赐 滴下了些许男儿泪

他拿着一块泥饼 分成四小片

老婆一片 儿子一片 女儿一片

边走边吃 带着背包 走到美国军机旁

“我是美国大使馆保安人员”他出示证件

“你有美国护照吗?”军人说

“没有。”他答道

“请你离开。美国感激你的功劳。美国不会忘记你。”军人说

军机载着美国子民飞走了

他失望地走在街上 卖香菸的商店复业了 开着电视机

“美国不会忘记您。美国一直与您同在。”奥巴马说

English Translation:
He Comes from The Third World by Yeow Boon-Kiat

He takes care of the security of the US Embassy in Haiti and protects its staffs.

He walks to work everyday before dawn, just to stand at the main entrance on time. When the US Ambassador’s Mercedes Benz arrives, he opens the door and greets: Good morning sir.

In the aftermath of 911 terrorist attack, ambassador tightened the security, made him check visitors thoroughly under the hot sun to make sure Americans are free from attack.

He works really hard, even helps the Ambassador and his staffs buying cigarette and beer at Port-au-Prince streets to ensure Americans’ safety.

He was off on the earthquake day. Walking on the street, all of sudden everything was trembling,
He ran home immediately, his family survived the quake.

He thought of his US boss, and ran to the embassy. Rumours were that even the UN headquarters had collapsed. He afraid that his boss was injured or even waving goodbye.

Fortunately, his boss survived the quake. He thanked God’s blessing, tears rolled down his cheek.

He divided a piece of mud biscuit into four quarters. His wife, daughter and son, each getting one quarter.

Bringing a bag and walked to the US Air Force plane.

“I’m a security guard at the US Embassy,” showing his ID.

“Do you hold a US passport?” the soldier asked.

“No,”

“Please go away. America will remember your contribution; America will never forget about you,”

The plane, for Americans only, fleed Haiti.

Disappointingly walking on the street, the shop selling cigarette reopens, the TV is on.

“America will never forget about you; America will always be with you,” Obama said.

THE OUTER SPACE TRAVEL 2007 太空漫遊2007

Monday, November 5th, 2007

dsc00520.JPG
WHERE ON EARTH IS MY RM 31 ?????

Can I buy the best telescope by using RM 31
To see the poor schools all the way from the outer space
To see the children, who, can’t afford to study
To see the patients, who, are suffering because of lack of $$$, to see the doctors
To see the old folks, who, are lonely and homeless
To see the nation’s poverty, starvation, struggle, and hopelessness,
After, paying RM 31

Can I recruit the best teacher by using RM 31
To, teach us, the essence of humility,
So that, when I spend RM 3.1K to fly to the UK,
I won’t argue with the pilot, that,
I too am a pilot….
To avoid demonstrating a joke in front of the passengers (if not the world)

Can I buy the best glasses (of near-sighted, far-sighted, presbyopia, astigmatism)
To let us see clearly:
1. The workers in the estates, who contributed a lot to the nation,
their children are somehow, not having enough clothes and are naked
2. The families destructed by shovels
3. Stagnant wages, wallets and purses on diet, expenses > income
4. Dependent on loans, bank notes fly
5. Robberies and rapes, where to complaint? Speechless, when, we stare at the sky
All in all, the people’s grievance and helplessness

Can I buy the best hearing aid,
To listen to the poor, when asking for the returning of the 31 bank notes,
All the way from the outer space

I dress up and drive a luxorious car to embellish my face,
Jamming on the road to feign as an advanced citizen,
But I am starving, have no $$$ to buy meals,
Dreaming and sleeping when I faint from starvation,
Vaguely I heard:

“Dear travellers, do you know that the roti canai and teh tarik served in the outer space, cost RM 15.5, respectively. It’s really highly priviledged, and suit you a lot. Please pay by using the POVERTY credit card, or let the people pay. We will serve you the elegant food after payment,”

Five minutes later:
“Dear travellers, please fasten your seatbelts, we will serve you elegant roti canai and teh tarik in a second. Please remember to promote to your friends on earth that they will surely become astronauts after finished eating these meals. THE OUTER SPACE TRAVEL 2007, your best destination. To realise the second-round astronaut dream, please call 1234567, our specialized staffs will answer all your questions,”

太空漫遊2007

31元可否
買到最好的望遠鏡
從宇宙天際 看見破爛的學校
看見渴望讀書識字而無錢上學的孩子
看見痛苦呻吟而無錢醫病的病人
看見孤苦伶仃無家可歸的老人
看見舉國上下
人人掏出31元之後的
窮困、飢餓、掙扎、絕望

31元可否
請到最好的教師
教人 虛懷若谷
花個RM 3.1K飛去英國
可以乖乖坐在飛機上
不去機艙跟機長理論
說我是飛行員 教其餘乘客(全世界?)笑話

31元可否
買到最好的(老花、近視、遠視、散光)眼鏡
教人看得見
1. 在園丘割樹膠 為國奉獻
家裡孩子 卻一絲不掛
2. 慘遭神手趕出家園
3. 工資不漲 減肥中的皮包 入不敷出
4. 舉債度日 鈔票似乎長了翅膀
5. 姦淫擄掠 投訴無門 無語問蒼天
的人們的憂傷與無助

31元可否
買到最好的助聽器
從宇宙天際 聽見
窮人追討31元的呼喊

我西裝筆挺 開名車裝飾門面 塞車扮先進
但我很飢餓 無錢開飯
餓昏了 倒頭便睡 夢中依稀聽見:

「各位旅客您好,您可知道?高掛在渺邈宇宙的印度煎餅與拉茶,各售RM 15.5,高貴得很,適用於尊貴的您。請用刷POVERTY銀行信用卡付帳,或選擇由人民口袋裡的錢代繳,付款完畢,我們即將為您奉上高雅的美食。」

五分鐘後:
「各位旅客您好,請繫緊腰帶,我們即將為您提供高貴印度煎餅與拉茶,用餐過後請記得向在地球的朋友宣傳,吃了保證搖身變成太空人。太空漫遊2007,您的理想天堂。欲一圓最二輪太空人,請撥專線1234567,我們將有專人耐心為您解答所有疑慮。」

what if

Tuesday, October 2nd, 2007

Every step that you take
Could be your biggest mistake
Coldplay- What If

coldplay14.jpg

What if
I was not the person I used to be
And have never ever run into you
What if
I temporarily separated from my soul
And kiss you goodbye
What if
I forgot the name I bore
And with anonymity I start again in another new land
What if
I myself drove a plane
And bring you to the place where you have been longing for
What if
I could rectify my mistake and silliness
And never repeat it again

Bored of Pretentious Human Nature

Wednesday, August 15th, 2007

I want to leave this country as soon as possible and start my life all over again in a place which nobody knows me. The more I am to face the pretence of the people around me, the more likely I will be disappointed in human instinct. I have been suffering so much for being able to see through human nature. Human beings are basically pretentious, and I am no exception. Ironically enough, I myself who act as pretentious as the others do, still irritate the pretentious human nature pretty much. Do I have the right to justify my own pretense by saying that I am not as pretentious as the others? Or I can justify my own pretense by saying that I am forced to do so, or my being pretentious is for other people’s sake?

If I wish to leave any countries or communities which I have lived in so far to ignore pretentious people and anticipate meeting truly genuine people elsewhere, I will then surely be disappointed by the very fact that I will still meet pretentious people no matter where I go, unless I am ready to be segregated from the mass which I allegedly claim as pretentious.