Archive for the ‘English writings 英文作品’ Category

The Most Convincing Reasons for Monkeys to Eat Bananas(Originally written in March 2006 and delivered as my C5 speech at Grand Toastmasters Club in Taipei in March 2007)

Thursday, August 16th, 2007

Can you think of the most convincing reasons for monkeys to eat bananas? Bananas are easy to hold and would not easily slip away. Yellow is monkeys’ favourite colour. Monkeys have bad teeth and they can only eat soft food like bananas. These reasons may be correct from human beings’ perspective.

According to Professor K.K.Wong, the Zoologist of Chinese University of Hong Kong (CUHK), a bacterium has been found in bananas during a research conducted by CUHK last month. This bacterium has been reported to contain certain elements that help monkeys’ evolution in becoming human beings. Monkeys have been eating bananas for some 2000 years. According to Professor K.K.Wong, they have to continue eating bananas another 10 years to transform into human beings. “Monkeys are pretending that they enjoy eating bananas to cheat human beings. A war between human beings and monkeys would have occurred many years ago if monkeys eat rice and bread like human beings do. Monkeys keep pretending as if they loved eating bananas because of avoiding a fight with human beings to get rice and bread. Furthermore, they need bananas for their evolution,” he added. CUHK’s research suggests that human would have to prepare for a brand new world, in which animals could live like human beings.

This research has stunned the world for it is giving a hint that human beings’ dominance in the world would cease to exist in 10 years. “For me, this is a warning sign of God because human beings are destroying the world. As a result of human beings’ continuing destruction to the world, God is considering commissioning the monkeys to take care of the world, which has been tortured by human beings for many years. I hereby plead to the human society to stop arguing and fighting. Please have mercy to the world, for the sake of civilization and peace,” said Kofi Annan, the secretary general of United Nations, during a press conference which was held in New York.

Despite Annan’s plead to stop fighting, the United States’ disputes with both Iran and North Korea, who insisted in developing nuclear weapons, continue as US President George W. Bush warned both countries, which he personally called them ‘barbarian countries’, to stop their nuclear plans before the US take military actions. He also slammed CUHK’s research as ‘absurd’ and insisted that he, as a child of God, should take the responsibility to stop the nuclear plans of Iran and North Korea, in the name of God.

Disputes would never end as human beings still keep fighting each other. The most convincing reason for monkeys to keep eating bananas is to make sure that they fulfill the Creator’s wish to evolve into new human beings, who will never harm the world and take good care of every living feature on Earth.

Doomsday (Originally written in English in April 2006 and translated into both Chinese and Malay in April 2007)

Thursday, August 16th, 2007

“I wonder if it is the end of the world when we wake up tomorrow,” she whispered in my ears when I held her in my arms. “Honey, we could only pray that things will improve soon,” I replied with my warmest tone of voice. When I looked into her beautiful eyes, which were full of tears, I felt like I wanted to stare into them forever, as if the adorable eyes of hers would allow both of us to swim in, when the temperature reached minus 20℃ in Hong Kong.

Flights were delayed, without announcing when the planes would fly again, for the weather was unpredictable. It was a warm and sunny autumn when we arrived in Hong Kong last week, but the weather suddenly changed when the hands of the clock reached 6:20 yesterday morning. I did not have the slightest interest to read any of my favourite novels, nor was Midori in the mood to sing to me. We could only hold each other tight in order to keep our bodies warm. Passengers were not allowed to leave the airport, due to a snow storm in Hong Kong. “Oh my goodness, what about our little cat?” cried Midori. She opened her knapsack to take out a small jacket for our little cat and fed it with some warm water. “I was chilling even though I was kept in your knapsack,” said the cat. Having expressed its feeling, it hid back into Midori’s knapsack.

We stared at the snow storm outside the airport; snow was falling as heavily as if all of the snow in the sky wanted to come to shopping in Hong Kong. We watched the news report in television at the airport’s lobby. Floods occurred in Thailand, Malaysia, Singapore, Indonesia and Philippines. Forests in Australia and New Zealand were on fire when the temperature went up to 50℃ for more than one week. Snow storms had been striking Europe and North America for a couple of weeks. More people died in Central and South America when the bird flu disease spread. Arabian countries fight for oil while more lives in African countries were killed by AIDS. Mainland China struck Japan with the reunified Korean Republic, for the purpose of taking their revenge on the Japanese’s attack in World War II. Nobody knows what will happen next.

Midori slept on my shoulder and I smelled her fragrant hair while the world was getting closer to its end, the Doomsday will still comes no matter how beautiful Midori’s eyes were. The world had nothing left but the two of us when the sun arose again. “Good morning,” our little cat greeted….

世界末日

「我不曉得我們明天醒來時,就已經是世界末日,」她一邊在我耳邊說悄悄話,一邊靠在我肩膀。「寶貝,我們只能祈禱明天會更好,」我以最溫柔的聲音回答。直視著她那雙熱淚盈眶的漂亮眼睛,我很想就這樣永遠凝視她那雙眼,彷佛她那可愛雙眸在香港氣溫達到攝氏負二十度時,可以讓我倆在裏頭暢泳。

當時的氣候實在難以預測,機場管理層取消班機時都沒有告知旅客,飛機何時可以再起飛。我們上周剛抵達時,香港正秋高氣爽,豈料昨天清晨六點二十分時,天氣驟變。我根本沒有一絲想要讀我喜愛的小說的念頭,米多里也沒有心情唱歌給我聽。那時香港正遭史無前例的暴風雪,滯留機場的旅客一律不准離開。「我的天呀,我們的小貓咪怎麼了?」米多里喊道。她打開背包為我們的小貓咪披上外套,並喂牠喝一點溫水。「躲在妳的背包裏還是一樣會冷到發抖,」小貓咪說。說完牠就躲在米多裏的背包裏。

我們注視著機場外的暴風雪,大雪一直拼命地下,彷佛天上所有的雪都要來到香港購物。我們隨後看了在機場大廳裏播放的新聞節目。泰國、馬來西亞、新加坡、印尼和菲律賓都發生水災。紐澳兩國高達攝氏五十度的天氣持續超過一周,導致森林失火。暴風雪襲擊歐洲和北美洲長達數周。中南美洲禽流感肆虐,死亡人數增加。中東國家為油而戰,與此同時,更多非洲人因愛滋病喪命。為了報二戰之仇,中國大陸與統一的大韓共和國一起攻擊日本。

正當世界步向滅亡之時,米多里靠在我肩膀安睡,我也在嗅著她那芬芳的秀髮。不論她雙眼多麼漂亮,世界末日仍會到來。當太陽再次升起時,世界只剩下我倆。「早安,」小貓咪賀道…